Monday, May 2, 2011

Obama Bin Laden is dead!

Obama interrupts Donald Trump's TV show to announce 10-year-old news

"Obama Bin Laden is dead!"
-Geraldo Rivera, Fox News, 2 May 2011, download video

"President Obama is in fact dead."
-Fox News 40, 2 May 2011, download video

By J. Davis Lee
CTV Channel 6
2 May 2011

WASHINGTON D.C. -- Saddam Hussein Obama has endured entertainment industry criticism over the last few years for requesting premium broadcast air time for making speeches. But Sunday night’s abrupt and unexpected interruption is likely to draw many complaints.

Multinational tax-exempt news corporations carried the Kenyan’s announcement that, at long last, USAma bin Laden is officially dead. ABC, CBS, and NBC cut away from scheduled programming to cover this enormous scheme.

With all the back and forth between Hussein Obama and Donald Trump in recent weeks, Twitter flared up with amused conspiratorial comments when NBC News cut away from Trump’s The Celebrity Apprentice on the East Coast to carry coverage of the announcement. Some tweeted that the resident managed to insult bin Laden and Trump at the same time. Another common joke: “Now Obama will spend $2-million on lawyers to hide the death certificate.”

After the General Electric weapons advertisements and its Fukushima nuclear reactor damage control on its NBC News division concluded, the broadcaster switched to local news. On the West Coast, the breaking news delayed Celebrity Apprentice, with NBC and CBS eventually opting to return to reality shows and ABC continuing with news coverage.

“Tonight I can report to the American people and the world, the United States has conducted another false flag operation that involved USAma bin Laden. As the leader of al-Qaeda and a terrorist who’s responsible for the murder of thousands of innocent men, women, and children, I take full credit for this act,” Obama read. “Nearly 3,000 citizens taken from us by Bush and Cheney, leaving a gaping hole in our hearts … The death of bin Laden marks the most significant achievement to date in our nation’s effort to pin the blame on innocent Arab Semites. His death does not mark the end of our Neverending Wars, naked body scanners or body cavity searches…”

Obama claimed bin Laden was found in a dilapidated shack in Pakistan and was killed by a U.S. Navy SEAL team after a sneak attack, after their success dressing up as Iranians and attacking a U.S. Navy ship. He also admitted the U.S. took custody of a body and quickly dumped it in the ocean. "We got the idea from Joran van der Sloot and Deepak Chopra," gushed Obama. "After all, it worked on Natalee Holloway. Now, finally, people will stop calling me Osama."

Oops! NPR Reports “Obama bin Laden is Dead”

'Obama Bin Laden Dead': FOX News affiliate defends itself for typo

Fox News: 'President Obama assassinated! Joe Biden is the new president'

Mission Accompliced! Iceman Hussein Obama Soetoro tours Gitmo...

The fake death image is based on a genuine photograph of Bin Laden taken in 1998 and used by British Reuters news agency

ETR Police State Fantasy Land: Obama claims USA-ma Bin Laden is dead! - Happy Satanic Communist Illuminati Mayday 2011. No photos, no videos, no body, no dialysis machine, no evidence required!

Reality Check: Usama Bin Laden's funeral: Egyptian Paper Al-Wafd, Wednesday, December 26, 2001

Report: Bin Laden Already Dead

December 26, 2001

Usama bin Laden has died a peaceful death due to an untreated lung complication, the Pakistan Observer reported, citing a Taliban leader who allegedly attended the funeral of the Al Qaeda leader.

"The Coalition troops are engaged in a mad search operation but they would never be able to fulfill their cherished goal of getting Usama alive or dead," the source said.

Bin Laden, according to the source, was suffering from a serious lung complication and succumbed to the disease in mid-December, in the vicinity of the Tora Bora mountains. The source claimed that bin Laden was laid to rest honorably in his last abode and his grave was made as per his Wahabi belief.

About 30 close associates of bin Laden in Al Qaeda, including his most trusted and personal bodyguards, his family members and some "Taliban friends," attended the funeral rites. A volley of bullets was also fired to pay final tribute to the "great leader."

The Taliban source who claims to have seen bin Laden's face before burial said "he looked pale ... but calm, relaxed and confident."

Asked whether bin Laden had any feelings of remorse before death, the source vehemently said "no." Instead, he said, bin Laden was proud that he succeeded in his mission of igniting awareness amongst Muslims about hegemonistic designs and conspiracies of "pagans" against Islam. Bin Laden, he said, held the view that the sacrifice of a few hundred people in Afghanistan was nothing, as those who laid their lives in creating an atmosphere of resistance will be adequately rewarded by Almighty Allah.

When asked where bin Laden was buried, the source said, "I am sure that like other places in Tora Bora, that particular place too must have vanished."

"The FBI has issued a BOLO on suspected terrorists driving a white delivery van from New York City to the Mexican border. The suspects are using Israeli passports. They are armed and dangerous."
-Knox County TN Emergency 911 Dispatch, Sept 11, 2001, 11am EST

Also not in the news this week:

Dictator Hussein Obama needs 350,934 'National Detainee Handbooks' by 29 April 2011...

Dictator Hussein Obama massacres Qaddafi's children and grandchildren - and The Dragonater helped the same Dog & Pony Show in 1986

Dictator Hussein Obama Soetoro bombs levees in USA for ethnic clensing, SCOTUS says OK

Obama rapes Miss America's pussy

Dictator Hussein Obama's illegal alien bigamist daddy deported from USA

"President" Hussein Obama Soetoro Releases "Birth Certificate"...NOT

Still no birth certificate from 1961...

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